TOO MUCH

Tw: Mental Health

✨ "Too Much"

That was the sound of the echo inside of me on Wednesday night. A Pisces Dark Moon. It eats you alive. It takes you dowm town Hades Town.

The last week that I had was the first one of the life that I have been asking for last December. And the moment I had it the voice came back.

You are too much.

And for a long time I used to believe it. I used to believe that the way I express myself is too much, too loud, too outgoing. I used to believe that it was wrong to show the unapologetic side and self. I used to believe that the way my thoughts and brain work are wrong compared to the standard of the society I grew up in.

I was never able to value my own boundaries. Because I had none. I only had love to give and show. But looking back I didn't know how to express that love without feeling guilty and wrong for it because so many people around me took advantage of it and at the same time couldn't handle me for it.

A bitter truth is that this society is build upon labels and boxes of surpressed emotions, trauma and stigma from history that has been written before. The patterns are still there. The pain. I see it all.

And sometimes that is the worst feeling ever. Seeing through people.

Some say it's a gift. But you know how it is with every gift there is duality. Now imagine what it's like to be capable to see under the surface all the time. To hear the truth. Even though a truth is a form of perception and perspective but the way I listen is deep the moment I pay attention. Because I don't do things subtle. It's either real deal or no deal.

I used to believe that I don't have a place in this world and that I was responsible to carry the weight alone on my shoulders like Atlas. What I know now is that neither should feel responsible to carry the weight of the world on their own.

What this world needs is union and community. We need to embrace the difference in our society regardless of race, gender and all the boxes that hold us back from creating that save space and community. We need to value and respect history and from that on evolve and create new standards and innovation for the thrive and sake of diversity.

And yes. I am that KING of a new generation of leaders. Fierce but kind. I am not for everyone. And I don't intend to be. Not anymore. I am my own kind of standard and I dare you to be yours. You don't want to be Lola Hamilton. LC is a fierce but kind leader that is changing the world every day. But deep down I am myself. Simply Lola.

And whoever you are I hope you dare and find your truth. I hope you let love into your world and life. I hope you are ready to open up and heal just as I am. Because as a leader of a new generation one can't do it all alone. I need each and every soul out there that is reading this message.

Dare to be yourself. And then we are changing the world together.

Love,
Lo